It wasn’t a really long day or anything, really. I had just walked out of the optician’s with my new pair of spectacles and I suddenly stopped on the pavement and thought for a second, 'Why not a pizza ? '.
While biting in to a slice of it, I recalled the early stages of my last break up : how emotionally unstable I was, how the sense of loss and grief compelled me to lose any joys of living. And then here I was ; alone, yet happy.
The restaurant was just a walk away and as my
feet led me upstairs and I ended up at a corner table that gave the view of the
street below, I finally unwound and thought about what I had gone through and what
I had become. Truth be told, a part of my thoughts kept swirling around the pizza
that was to come as well.
I had another look at my pizza. Slice by
slice, it was just disappearing. Then it hit me. Among many other comparisons,
why isn’t life ever compared to a pizza ? Like literally, we share
pizzas, or we eat them alone and it comes to an end to see whether you liked it
or not.
Life my friend, is exactly the same. We spend
it sharing things with our family, friends, better-halfs and worse ;
even our enemies. Then there comes moments / phases in your life that you have
for yourself, if correctly said, that you HAVE to have for yourself. It is in
these moments that you figure out what you want, what you would like your life
to be and most importantly, what you do not want in life or from it.
None of us are Gurus regarding matters of life ; not even sufficiently adult at times. However, I do
know one thing now. Being alone is meant to be cherished, it is meant to be
used to reinvent yourself, to see new dimensions of you to develop yourself. In
my humble opinion, we all should focus on becoming strong, individuals that can actually survive sans the support of a significant other. At the end
of the self training, marriage, love or even a simple relationship will purely be
a matter of choice and not a matter of vulnerability or survival as it is in
most of the cases today.
Love yourself !! Masturdate !! (Take
yourself out for dates and have fun. I know obviously that you are already in
to the typo ;) ) As you will meet someone who you find finally fit enough
to tolerate you for the rest of your life, you will see that you will be a
support and a true companion for that person and not a clingy elderly child who
obviously needs to be taken care of. You need to pull yourself out of the misery
and love yourself first. The only worthy piece of advise my last ex ever gave
me : ' Babi, you can’t love anyone else unless you love yourself
first '.
Hash
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